Change
I'm not sure. Not sure how I'm feeling tonight. Seems like new beginnings are bringing endings that make me sad. Can't really explain what that means. But I know I feel somewhat torn about which path to take. It's not the exact same dialogue I've had for months. Do I work? Do I act? Not that conversation. This is one about balance. This is the one about boundaries. About growing up but still remaining true to youth. To play. To fun. It's not an easy balance. And I suppose, right now, I'm dealing with feelings of unbalance because I'm going through some change.
Change is something everyone resists but it's unavoidable. You can either adjust or you can fear it. You can either recognize what it's bringing out in you or you can ignore it. I guess that's where I'm at. I guess I just want to know what's right for me as an artist and what is right for me as a person. A person who wants stability and success just like the next person. But what defines that success? I could say "not money!" but let's not lie. We all want to feel safe and know that someday we can support a family if we want to. We all want no debt. We all want to feel that we can stand on our own, without a struggle for the next paycheck. And many people my age have that. I must say that I fall a bit behind when it comes to financial stability. I guess that's just the choice I made as an artist when I moved here. The age of 30 was never a goal for family, or wealth. I just want to reach 30 and know that I can have balance. Really, that's it. Good balance. Perhaps it will come to me. Who knows.
Change is something everyone resists but it's unavoidable. You can either adjust or you can fear it. You can either recognize what it's bringing out in you or you can ignore it. I guess that's where I'm at. I guess I just want to know what's right for me as an artist and what is right for me as a person. A person who wants stability and success just like the next person. But what defines that success? I could say "not money!" but let's not lie. We all want to feel safe and know that someday we can support a family if we want to. We all want no debt. We all want to feel that we can stand on our own, without a struggle for the next paycheck. And many people my age have that. I must say that I fall a bit behind when it comes to financial stability. I guess that's just the choice I made as an artist when I moved here. The age of 30 was never a goal for family, or wealth. I just want to reach 30 and know that I can have balance. Really, that's it. Good balance. Perhaps it will come to me. Who knows.
Comments