The Scarlet Letter Y
I know three relationships that have gone bust from a cheating male partner. There are always other issues-communication, lack of support, or general boredom. You get the picture. And in all there instances, I know the other woman. I don't know her well. But I see her around. They are all quiet, sweet, and seem harmless. At first, I burn with frustration for the situation. But then I realize they aren't mean or out to get anyone. They found someone they connect with. And they felt no real bad if he left the one he's currently with. From their perspective, they want to be with him.
I'm not really feeling a sense of "brand her!" or "off with her head." What I wonder is: why are they willing to get involved in these situations. EVEN if he says he's done with his partner, there are still lingering emotions and communication to wrap things up or in some cases, keep an attachment. Maybe she doesn't realize this. But us women all have a deep instinct. I think I would be underestimating them if I said they had no clue that they are involved in a bit of drama.
WHY is it that some women are willing to get involved in drama, at any cost? WHY is it that some women can't see that they deserve to love someone who is minus the baggage? Perhaps they feel it will eventually fade away, and their love will be free from those demons. It doesn't work that way. Remember the old adage: if he did it to her he'll do it to you.
One of the three women I speak of was someone who slept with my 2 year boyfriend in college. If you are wondering if they are still together: yes. They are married. But if you're wondering if the lingering garbage ever went away? About four years ago, while they were engaged, he was calling me to say hi. I thought we were just being friendly, reconnecting, forgiving, I'm not sure. He said he didn't want his now wife to know he had called me, he told me. I haven't been keen on the friendship since. Some men are never going to get rid of their issues.
I'm not really feeling a sense of "brand her!" or "off with her head." What I wonder is: why are they willing to get involved in these situations. EVEN if he says he's done with his partner, there are still lingering emotions and communication to wrap things up or in some cases, keep an attachment. Maybe she doesn't realize this. But us women all have a deep instinct. I think I would be underestimating them if I said they had no clue that they are involved in a bit of drama.
WHY is it that some women are willing to get involved in drama, at any cost? WHY is it that some women can't see that they deserve to love someone who is minus the baggage? Perhaps they feel it will eventually fade away, and their love will be free from those demons. It doesn't work that way. Remember the old adage: if he did it to her he'll do it to you.
One of the three women I speak of was someone who slept with my 2 year boyfriend in college. If you are wondering if they are still together: yes. They are married. But if you're wondering if the lingering garbage ever went away? About four years ago, while they were engaged, he was calling me to say hi. I thought we were just being friendly, reconnecting, forgiving, I'm not sure. He said he didn't want his now wife to know he had called me, he told me. I haven't been keen on the friendship since. Some men are never going to get rid of their issues.
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