Happy Hump Day from Francisco Foreskin

Happy Hump Day! Zees is what I'm told anyway. What does thees even mean? I doe no.

But one fing I know for sure ees that pretty soon, it ees going to be Thanksgiving! And do you remember zee last Thanksgiving! Actually pretty sure eet ees been about 2 years. Ask YoBalls MaMouth. My no longer wife but still talk about me giving her money every month or else. We made that video when we first moved to America and we have come a long way.

Anyberries, after living here in zees country for two years I've learned a lot about maself and about American bullsheet. Here are some of those fings.

Number 1. I had NO IDEA zat when you go into some sort of public place such as a bus stop or a potty box (port a box?) zat you usually ignore everyone. Do not say hello. Do not smile or offer up a seep of your coffee. Ees a general beeg no no. I learned zees when I got some hot coffee thrown back in ma face. No big deal. Americans do not want to make with you a friend. Unless you are buying something from them.

Number 2. American food tastes like Clorox wipes meets animal fat. Very much into cleaning products and so I noticed when you go to McDonalds or Wendy's you can now get wet wipes. Well be careful because that sheet taste nasty when you lick your hands after eating Chicken tenders.

Number 3. Ees pretty much ok for children to hit you. I guess zees ees some sort of traditional fing. I had to stop into some kind of toddler gym to ask directions once and I see these kids hitting their parents for some donuts, or some candy and zee parents not really care they are on their Blackberry's. However, not ok to hit children. Also learned zees zee hard way.

Number 4. You can blow sheet up if you are celebrating a sport or American independence. But if you drive your planes into two towers you will most likely end up living a nightmare while soldiers invade your country and kill your families.

That ees about it. Goodnight.

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