Perfect Trust

There are no promises. There are no external certainties. There are no universal rules of fairness. There are things that happen that we don't expect. I teter on believing in a higher power because of this. It's the ultimate argument that we all have with each other. With ourselves. I don't want you to tell me there is a God. Not because I don't believe you. I just don't want you to say that. It's not really about that. It doesn't matter sometimes. If something happens. It's done. It's done and its happened and I can either choose to believe that the universe wants to teach me something about myself or I can choose to believe that there are reasons I'll never know or I can pitch a fit. Or I can believe it all while pitching a fit. I fell up the stairs today. Fuck it. You know what I mean? Existing without dwelling is the hardest thing to do but sometimes you have to do it. To me, its the only way to evolve or its the only way to be still. Either way the world will keep moving past you. So you'll either ride the wind or you'll just listen to it. Articulating all this is a bit twisted. Or maybe you are at the end of this paragraph and it makes perfect sense. And I'll tell you this. I caught myself from my fall well before my mind knew I had fallen. I realized I had fallen afterwards once my hands were out in front of me and it was all over. That's clarity. Maybe. That's perfect trust.