A Juicer Infomercial at Costco

An infomercial at Costco. It feels so cliche. All the old people are swirled around "Tony" (I named him) as he gives a demonstration and diatribe about eternal youth and how buying this juicer will take these old people and make them look like him. It was so odd. Standing there watching all this. It's too late Tony! These people already aged. Unless, is Tony implying that his juicer is a time machine!!!?

"Hi, I'm Tony Tigger, here to interupt Jessica's stupid effing blog. FYI, which means for your information, my juicer IS in fact a fountain of youth and if you drink it you will find yourself more energized, fresh, and ready for life. For 3 easy payments of $29.99 myself, and Costco, can bring a more vibrant and energetic you back to life! First open the juicer, and second put the fruits in. Watch it juice. It's that simple. I work out eight times a day, which is also recommended. It is also recommended that you try some of the following anti aging techniques that I also use:

Tanning
Botox
Swinging
Vacations to exotic islands with hot women
Spread oil on your body
Steroids
Listen to Eye of the Tiger on your I-Pod over and over at work
Hang out with high school or jr. high kids
Hair Gel (Pantene)
Waxing
Make strawberry jam for fun

Those are just some examples. I lead a healthful and fit life. So can you!"