The Passing Clouds
I laid in bed. The clouds passed, like life, I thought about how they represented time.
My dad had just called earlier to say that my grandfather, who had cancer, may only have a week to live. We had known for over a month that his liver cancer would take over his body quickly, but they said six months. I had visited twice. The second time I said I would come back and bring food on August 8th.
"Well I'll still come to visit next weekend."
"Ok, honey."
My sister is visiting. She said she would drive to visit him this coming Monday and Tuesday. That I could join her. But I have so much going on. So much to cancel.
But I still laid in bed thinking back on my childhood. The times when my grandfather had tickled me or told me a war story that I didn't quite understand. He took the time to have moments with me. I should do the same. I told my husband last night, "I think I'm going to cancel my rehearsals and appointments. I'm going to go visit. Just in case." He thought it was the right thing to do too.
At 5:00 this morning Brent left. We kissed goodbye. Usually I go right back to sleep with no problem. But I was restless, I tossed and turned. Something felt weird and unsettled. It must have been an hour later that I finally fell asleep peacefully.
My dad called this morning. "Your grandfather passed at 6:00am today."
I already knew, when my phone rang, that he would tell me that. But the timing was eerily chill and I felt that somehow, through sleep I was connected to my grandfather and he was in my thoughts. Just as I came to peace with what might happen to him, and that I couldn't control fate or my role in it, he passed. My dad said he went peacefully.
I woke my sister this morning and told her the news. These things are never easy. But with gratitude I think of my grandfather now and am thankful that he rests in peace.
My dad had just called earlier to say that my grandfather, who had cancer, may only have a week to live. We had known for over a month that his liver cancer would take over his body quickly, but they said six months. I had visited twice. The second time I said I would come back and bring food on August 8th.
"Well I'll still come to visit next weekend."
"Ok, honey."
My sister is visiting. She said she would drive to visit him this coming Monday and Tuesday. That I could join her. But I have so much going on. So much to cancel.
But I still laid in bed thinking back on my childhood. The times when my grandfather had tickled me or told me a war story that I didn't quite understand. He took the time to have moments with me. I should do the same. I told my husband last night, "I think I'm going to cancel my rehearsals and appointments. I'm going to go visit. Just in case." He thought it was the right thing to do too.
At 5:00 this morning Brent left. We kissed goodbye. Usually I go right back to sleep with no problem. But I was restless, I tossed and turned. Something felt weird and unsettled. It must have been an hour later that I finally fell asleep peacefully.
My dad called this morning. "Your grandfather passed at 6:00am today."
I already knew, when my phone rang, that he would tell me that. But the timing was eerily chill and I felt that somehow, through sleep I was connected to my grandfather and he was in my thoughts. Just as I came to peace with what might happen to him, and that I couldn't control fate or my role in it, he passed. My dad said he went peacefully.
I woke my sister this morning and told her the news. These things are never easy. But with gratitude I think of my grandfather now and am thankful that he rests in peace.
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